Mai Amigurumi :]
Rule #1: No time spent crocheting is ever wasted.
Rule #2: Keep track of your markers.
Rule #3: That’s not a mistake, that’s a design element.
Rule #4: There’s no such thing as too much yarn.
Rule #5: There’s no crying in crochet.
Rule #6: Never start a project without at least two hooks in the required size.
Rule #7: No coffee within 10 feet of yarn, projects, patterns or critical paperwork.
Rule #8: Block that puppy.
Rule #9: If the hook is not moving easily and smoothly in and out of the stitches, you are crocheting too tightly. Relax.
Rule #10: If it hurts, stop.
Rule #11: Check your work. Often.
Rule #12: Seam crochet only when absolutely unavoidable.
Rule #13: Cut yarn only when absolutely unavoidable (see special circumstance Rule #19).
Rule #14: The private should look as good as the public.
Rule #15: Whenever doable, obtain twice as much yarn as you think the project will require (a corollary to Rule #4).
Rule #16: There is no right way or wrong way, but there is the way to get the same results as shown.
Rule #17: Listen to the yarn.
Rule #18: Yarn sometimes lies.
Rule #19: Exterminate all knots and wonky sections as they arise from a skein.
Rule #20: UFOs that have not spoken to you for more than a year may be considered stash in pre-crocheted form.
Rule #21: Read the fracking pattern.
Rule #22: The pattern could be wrong.
Rule #23: Get it when you see it because when you come back next time it might not be there (another corollary to Rule #4).
Rule #24: Life is too short to mess with indifferent yarn.
Rule #25: Sweat the details.
Rule #26: Crochet is not dumb and neither are crocheters.
Rule #27: Knitting is not the enemy.
Rule #28: Anyone who doesn’t get Rule #26 is the enemy.
Illustrations by May Ann Licudine (aka Mall )
website l tumblr l dA l shop
Note: Please read Mall´s Blogspot and send her a lot of good wishes and hugs guys! Thank you!
wake up america
this is to educate my non-American followers. This really is how the US sees itself. (and yes, 95% of the time, Florida = WHAT?!)
As a Floridian, I attest that the above comment is correct.
Who taught me to suck in my stomach,
or my cheeks?
Who told me to stand with my legs apart
and my hips thrust back
to create the illusion of a gap
between my thighs?
Who made me believe that the most beautiful part of me
is my negative space?
Negative Space (via yoursly)
(Source: devonsdiary, via my-da-best-evah)
Men had no problem violating women’s bodies while they had on corsets, petticoats and farthingales, so what the fuck makes you think a short skirt has anything to do with it?
(Source: morenamagia, via my-da-best-evah)
petition to rename the usa ‘south canada’
what about alaska
are we then normal canada
canada a bit to the left
What about South America? Is that just America? Or South South Canada?
i cried my ass of laughing
i caN’T BREATHE OH MY GOD
I’m not even from Canada but I approve this change of names
If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.
I reblogged this at like 4am and I’ve spent the whole day thinking about it and randomly laughing
“Your name is Tasbeeh. Don’t let them call you by anything else.”
My mother speaks to me in Arabic; the command sounds more forceful in her mother tongue, a Libyan dialect that is all sharp edges and hard, guttural sounds. I am seven years old and it has never occurred to me to disobey my mother. Until twelve years old, I would believe God gave her the supernatural ability to tell when I’m lying.
“Don’t let them give you an English nickname,” my mother insists once again, “I didn’t raise amreekan.”
My mother spits out this last word with venom. Amreekan. Americans. It sounds like a curse coming out of her mouth. Eight years in this country and she’s still not convinced she lives here. She wears her headscarf tightly around her neck, wades across the school lawn in long, floor-skimming skirts. Eight years in this country and her tongue refuses to bend and soften for the English language. It embarrasses me, her heavy Arab tongue, wrapping itself so forcefully around the clumsy syllables of English, strangling them out of their meaning.
But she is fierce and fearless. I have never heard her apologize to anyone. She will hold up long grocery lines checking and double-checking the receipt in case they’re trying to cheat us. My humiliation is heavy enough for the both of us. My English is not. Sometimes I step away, so people don’t know we’re together but my dark hair and skin betray me as a member of her tribe.
On my first day of school, my mother presses a kiss to my cheek.
“Your name is Tasbeeh,” she says again, like I’ve forgotten. “Tasbeeh.”
Roll call is the worst part of my day. After a long list of Brittanys, Jonathans, Ashleys, and Yen-but-call-me-Jens, the teacher rests on my name in silence. She squints. She has never seen this combination of letters strung together in this order before. They are incomprehensible. What is this h doing at the end? Maybe it is a typo.
“Tasbeeh,” I mutter, with my hand half up in the air. “Tasbeeh.”
“Do you go by anything else?”
“No,” I say. “Just Tasbeeh. Tas-beeh.”
“Tazbee. All right. Alex?”
She moves on before I can correct her. She said it wrong. She said it so wrong. I have never heard my name said so ugly before, like it’s a burden. Her entire face contorts as she says it, like she is expelling a distasteful thing from her mouth. She avoids saying it for the rest of the day, but she has already baptized me with this new name. It is the name everyone knows me by, now, for the next six years I am in elementary school. “Tazbee,” a name with no grace, no meaning, no history; it belongs in no language.
“Tazbee,” says one of the students on the playground, later. “Like Tazmanian Devil?” Everyone laughs. I laugh too. It is funny, if you think about it.
I do not correct anyone for years. One day, in third grade, a plane flies above our school.
“Your dad up there, Bin Laden?” The voice comes from behind. It is dripping in derision.
“My name is Tazbee,” I say. I said it in this heavy English accent, so he may know who I am. I am American. But when I turn around they are gone.
I go to middle school far, far away. It is a 30-minute drive from our house. It’s a beautiful set of buildings located a few blocks off the beach. I have never in my life seen so many blond people, so many colored irises. This is a school full of Ashtons and Penelopes, Patricks and Sophias. Beautiful names that belong to beautiful faces. The kind of names that promise a lifetime of social triumph.
I am one of two headscarved girls at this new school. We are assigned the same gym class. We are the only ones in sweatpants and long-sleeved undershirts. We are both dreading roll call. When the gym teacher pauses at my name, I am already red with humiliation.
“How do I say your name?” she asks.
“Tazbee,” I say.
“Can I just call you Tess?”
I want to say yes. Call me Tess. But my mother will know, somehow. She will see it written in my eyes. God will whisper it in her ear. Her disappointment will overwhelm me.
“No,” I say, “Please call me Tazbee.”
I don’t hear her say it for the rest of the year.
My history teacher calls me Tashbah for the entire year. It does not matter how often I correct her, she reverts to that misshapen sneeze of a word. It is the ugliest conglomeration of sounds I have ever heard.
When my mother comes to parents’ night, she corrects her angrily, “Tasbeeh. Her name is Tasbeeh.” My history teacher grimaces. I want the world to swallow me up.
My college professors don’t even bother. I will only know them for a few months of the year. They smother my name in their mouths. It is a hindrance for their tongues. They hand me papers silently. One of them mumbles it unintelligibly whenever he calls on my hand. Another just calls me “T.”
My name is a burden. My name is a burden. My name is a burden. I am a burden.
On the radio I hear a story about a tribe in some remote, rural place that has no name for the color blue. They do not know what the color blue is. It has no name so it does not exist. It does not exist because it has no name.
At the start of a new semester, I walk into a math class. My teacher is blond and blue-eyed. I don’t remember his name. When he comes to mine on the roll call, he takes the requisite pause. I hold my breath.
“How do I pronounce your name?” he asks.
I say, “Just call me Tess.”
“Is that how it’s pronounced?”
I say, “No one’s ever been able to pronounce it.”
“That’s probably because they didn’t want to try,” he said. “What is your name?”
When I say my name, it feels like redemption. I have never said it this way before. Tasbeeh. He repeats it back to me several times until he’s got it. It is difficult for his American tongue. His has none of the strength, none of the force of my mother’s. But he gets it, eventually, and it sounds beautiful. I have never heard it sound so beautiful. I have never felt so deserving of a name. My name feels like a crown.
“Thank you for my name, mama.”
When the barista asks me my name, sharpie poised above the coffee cup, I tell him: “My name is Tasbeeh. It’s a tough t clinging to a soft a, which melts into a silky ssss, which loosely hugs the b, and the rest of my name is a hard whisper — eeh. Tasbeeh. My name is Tasbeeh. Hold it in your mouth until it becomes a prayer. My name is a valuable undertaking. My name requires your rapt attention. Say my name in one swift note – Tasbeeeeeeeh – sand let the h heat your throat like cinnamon. Tasbeeh. My name is an endeavor. My name is a song. Tasbeeh. It means giving glory to God. Tasbeeh. Wrap your tongue around my name, unravel it with the music of your voice, and give God what he is due
Tasbeeh Herwees, The Names They Gave Me (via cat-phuong)
I am weeping.
(Source: rabbrakha, via my-da-best-evah)
"oh ur a singer? sing us something!"
"Oh ur an artist? Draw us something!"
"Oh you’re a writer? Let us read some of your work!"
"Oh you’re a-"
(Source: basement-relatable, via my-da-best-evah)
mostly im glad america got its independence because the british call a grilled cheese a cheese toasty and im not about that
» Tumblr Ask
I just crochet a lot. So I decided to make a blog for all my things :3
Tweaked by Kaycee and/or cutetumblrlayouts
| Base theme by Sarah Mogin
| Powered by Tumblr